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Ayla Harveyuhired team
October 16

How to Quit and Still Get a Good Reference

Quitting is hard. This complex process often brings feelings of fear, shame, doubt, and sometimes anger or hurt. Regardless of your relationship with your soon-to-be former managers or bosses, there’s a strong possibility they will become your future reference, and a potential employer may contact them to ask about you.

In this article, we will explore what references are and why they matter, outline a list of dos and don’ts for quitting a job, and provide useful tips to further improve your chances of securing a positive reference.

What Is a Reference and Why Do You Need a Good One?

What Is a Reference and Why Do You Need a Good One?

A reference, in general, is a review of you as a professional in your field. It can vary in form (written or verbal), source (past or present employer, manager, or colleague), and purpose (letter of recommendation or professional reference). Overall, it’s a crucial part of your professional image, and depending on its content, it can either boost your chances of landing a job or severely hinder them.

The most common situation when someone needs references is after they’ve started attending interviews but haven't received an offer yet, and HR departments request a reference list.

It can also be useful when you've accepted a new offer or are planning to do so. Having a good reference from the company you're leaving ensures you maintain positive relationships, which can be helpful in various situations, such as if you'd like to return in the future.

A good or bad reference can significantly influence a potential employer’s perception of you as a specialist and may be the final factor in their decision to extend an offer. Let’s take a closer look at what you should do – and avoid doing – to leave on good terms and secure a positive reference.

Resignation Action Plan

There is a certain etiquette involved in leaving a company, along with rules outlined in company policies and your contract. While following these guidelines can be challenging, remember that if you want to receive something, you must be willing to give something in return.

Period of Notice

Period of Notice

There are two cases to consider regarding this topic, which depend solely on your contract:

  1. Your contract clearly outlines the notice period you must adhere to. In this case, you are legally obliged to inform your employer in advance and provide an official notice. Exceptions to this requirement include specific legal reasons, such as unsafe working conditions, harassment, violations, health issues, and others.
  2. If your contract does not specify a notice period, you have the legal right to leave as soon as you decide to do so. However, if you wish to part on good terms, it’s advisable to give the company time to find your replacement. Typically, it is considered polite to provide at least two weeks' notice or more.

Form of Notice

An official resignation letter should always be provided, whether in paper form or as an email. Ensure that it is clear and well-written, adhering to all professional standards. However, don’t rush to hand it over right away. The best way to inform your company of your intentions is through a one-on-one conversation, or a video call, if you work remotely or live far away.

Remember: never inform your manager about your departure through a message or call! This is considered rude and unprofessional behavior. Avoid starting with the HR department or gossiping with colleagues. It's best if the news comes directly from you rather than through the grapevine.

Keep It Going

Keep It Going

Just because you're leaving soon doesn't mean your responsibilities are over. At the very least, you should continue performing your duties as usual. It's essential to stay focused and meet others' expectations during this transition.

If you relax too soon, you risk damaging the positive impression you’ve built over months or years with the company. The last memory they have of you could be an unpleasant one, characterized by arrogance and laziness.

Teach Your Replacement

The primary reason for adhering to a notice period is to provide the company with the time it needs to find your replacement. If a new person starts before you leave, they will become your responsibility during the transition.

Whether the new hire is someone promoted to your role, transitioned from another department, or brought in externally, they often require time to familiarize themselves with the responsibilities, get to know their new colleagues, and understand the best practices that may come naturally to you.

Your role is to facilitate a smoother transition and help your replacement adapt quickly. This may not be the easiest task, as you’ll need to articulate processes that you instinctively perform. Additionally, it’s essential to clarify the responsibilities of your colleagues whom your replacement will interact with, so they know whom to approach for assistance with various issues.

Pass It On

Pass It On

Even if the company hasn’t found a replacement in time, do your best to minimize the impact of your departure. Delegate some of your daily tasks and responsibilities to colleagues whose roles closely align with yours. However, be careful not to overwhelm anyone with additional work.

Focus on completing projects and tasks that can be finished while you’re still available. For others, identify new team members who can take over those responsibilities. However, avoid simply dropping these tasks on them; take the time to explain and teach them what’s needed.

Be Patient and Friendly

Be Patient and Friendly

If your primary reason for leaving is your colleagues, it can be a difficult situation. However, it’s essential to remain professional and avoid burning bridges. Consider this: if your entire department were to be restructured from scratch, would you want to return?

To show your managers and colleagues that you’re a serious and dedicated professional capable of managing conflicts, remain friendly, communicate openly with everyone, and strive to maintain working relationships until your last day. Damaging relationships with those you dislike will only hurt you in the long run!

Exit Interview

If this is your first time leaving a job voluntarily, you might not be familiar with the concept of an exit interview, especially if it wasn't a common practice at your previous workplaces. However, you may encounter it now for the first time. So, what exactly is it?

Coming from the name, an exit interview is conducted by an HR specialist when you leave the company. This type of interview serves several purposes:

  1. Understand your reasons for leaving. The company aims to determine why you're leaving to see if there's anything they could have done to retain you, as well as identify areas for improvement to reduce turnover.
  2. Document your feedback. Your responses are recorded to provide valuable insights for the company. This information may be useful if you ever decide to return, as it can reveal aspects of your experience that the company might not have remembered.
  3. Ensure legal compliance. The interview also assesses whether the company adheres to legal requirements and whether you've encountered issues like management misuse, harassment, or an unsafe work environment. If you've experienced any of these problems, you might hesitate to share your true reasons with your manager but can feel comfortable communicating them to the HR department.

Be honest and open in your responses, but ensure that your comments do not compromise your professional image. Remember to act wisely during the discussion.

Asking for a Reference

Depending on your situation, requesting a reference from certain individuals can be challenging. If your relationship with your manager or employer isn't strong, asking them for a reference may not work in your favor. Therefore, the first and most crucial step is…

Choosing the Right Person

Choosing the Right Person

Your reference doesn’t have to be your direct manager, and that’s completely understandable. It’s normal not to connect with everyone. Here are three different options to consider:

  1. Your current/last manager: If you have a good relationship with your manager, this is the ideal choice. Your most recent workplace – especially if you’ve been there for more than six months – highlights your recently acquired skills and knowledge. Your manager is typically the first person potential employers will contact to inquire about them.
  2. Your current/previous colleagues: If you can't rely on your manager, consider selecting a colleague instead. The key is to choose someone who can accurately evaluate your professional abilities in your field.
  3. One of your previous managers: If you feel that your last workplace didn't contribute to your growth or isn't relevant to the job you're applying for, consider reaching out to a former manager. This is especially effective if you have maintained good communication and a positive relationship with them.

Just ensure that your reference is knowledgeable in your area of expertise and can confirm they have worked closely with you.

Recommendation Letter

In addition to asking for a reference, you also have the right to request a recommendation letter. While both serve similar purposes, there are some key differences. A recommendation letter is a written document typically included in your application materials. To use it effectively in your job search, you should inform the person beforehand. Recommendation letters are usually more formal and detailed than standard verbal or written references, covering various aspects of you as both a person and a professional.

You can pursue both options if you wish, but this requires finding at least two people: one for the reference and another for the recommendation letter.

In the Right Place at the Right Time

It's important to recognize that asking someone to be your reference can be an imposition. Once you've chosen the right person, approach them with politeness and humility, and be prepared for the possibility that they may decline. If possible, try to meet in person; if you work remotely or have relocated, request a video call instead. Discussing this matter via email or direct messages can come across as informal and impolite.

Another crucial factor is timing. The earlier you ask for references in your job search, the more likely you are to use them effectively and secure a good job. If you’re asking your direct manager or employer for a reference, it’s essential that you inform them of your decision to leave before they are contacted by the company to which you applied. Otherwise, it may come as an unpleasant surprise for both you and your manager.

Building a List of References

Building a List of References

In today's job search process, adding references directly to your resume is generally seen as excessive. Unlike five years ago, HR specialists now expect you to have a list of references ready when requested, rather than cluttering your resume with them. To avoid appearing inattentive or outdated, it's best to prepare a separate document for your references.

Even if you’re feeling nervous or have a strong dislike for your boss, maintaining at least a neutral relationship is beneficial. While it's unlikely you’ll return to work with them, a good rapport can prevent them from holding grudges or making your life difficult out of offense or wounded pride. Follow these simple rules, apply some strategic thinking, and things will likely turn in your favor.